On the day that James passed away I had planned to take him to the beach. He was super adamant about seeing the ocean and I wanted to just take him for a nice drive and sit in the car and share the view with him. It was also an opportunity for us to spend some more 1:1 time together and to let him know how much I love and appreciate him. That morning I called off of work to be home with him after having a bad night. I also knew that a drive to the beach was out of the question with the way he was feeling.
At this very moment as I’m writing this, I’m sitting on a cliff over looking the ocean. It’s so peaceful, It’s raining, and the sound of the waves and the rain hitting the ground are everything that I didn’t even know I needed today. A few days before our loss, James told me he left me a letter on his laptop. I was hesitant to read it so soon, but I had a strong feeling inside telling me to drive to the beach today and read it there.
So as I sit here alone with his laptop reading his letter, I can sense his presence around me. He always had a way of making me feel so loved and today was just another reminder of how powerful our bond was. It was definitely like no other.
Although I loved sharing our stories with all of those who followed his journey, I’m keeping his final words for me private and holding them close to my heart. I hope he comes to me tonight in my dreams. I want to see his smile and hear his laugh. I love and miss him so much!
MOMENTS THAT BRING US TOGETHER 
Been thinking of you all…..Praying for you, thank you for writing. Your devotion to each other was everlasting.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Dearest sister. I can not express how I feel about losing my baby brother, or how much I will miss him. I’m so happy for him that he had such a wonderful wife as you. His love is so strong, I feel it within us, and all the family and friends. He left us this bond, and I know he will always be with us.
We love you and your wonderful children.
God took him from us that morning, but you will always be his angel.
Love you.
Sylvia, Luis, and Family
LikeLiked by 1 person
Sister, I am so glad you took that trip to the beach with Mi hermanito in your heart. He was there with you, no doubt about that. He is in a beautiful place now and free of pain. Thank you for making him so happy and for the amazing family you and he have built together. He is most definitely smiling down upon you all and will be watching over you forever. We love you ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
My heart is aching for you. Thank you for so eloquently and rawly sharing your journey. I will continue to pray for comfort for you and those who are missing James. We serve a mighty God that he gets to spend eternity with while he waits for you. ❤️
LikeLiked by 1 person
I am so sorry for your loss Bambi. My heart goes out to you at this difficult time.
Prayers if comfort and peace during this difficult time.
Love,
Michelle and Mike Lloyd
LikeLiked by 1 person